Why You Do What You Do

Hi darling, before we get started, I'd like to thank you for being here.

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There's this system in life:

I drew a lil diagram to show you.

People all over the place use this model. Imagine this in your mind: You wake up at a reasonable hour without any carryover from yesterday's thoughts, feelings, or behaviors. It truly is a new day. There are a bunch of other you's in the house, what on earth! One of them is next to you, under the covers, hair in a rag-a-mess, on her phone. One is next to that one, out like a light and taking up practically the whole bed. Another is in the bathroom, brushing her teeth and listening to some upbeat music or a podcast. Out on the porch is a you that's simply looking out at the warm sky.

These are each versions of you five minutes into the future. Now let's take a look at the thirty minutes ahead crew. The you that was passed out is still passed out. The one that was on the phone is still on the phone. The teeth-brusher is freshly showered, smells lovely and is currently doing their hair. The one that was on the porch came back in to grab a book and is out there having a good read.

An hour after you've woken up, the two that were lying in bed haven't moved an inch. The teeth-brusher is finished with her makeup, dressed, and looks like a bombshell. The reader is just coming in to make some breakfast and will probably sleep better tonight because being in the sun between 7am and 9am aids melatonin production (Tip from Katrina).

Each of these you'z have chosen different mornings based on their waking thoughts.

The one that went back to sleep may have thought, "I don't have anywhere to be so I might as well go back to bed," or "I'd just rather be asleep than be awake if I'm honest. I'm happier when I'm unconscious," or maybe she thought, "Gosh, I really am just exhausted and think my body needs more sleep."

The one on the phone might have thought, "I'm awake, now I can have some fun," or "I'm awake, now I gotta drown out my sorrows with some tikky tokky," or "I'm awake. I'm going to catch up on the news and answer some emails for work."

The one that got ready immediately may have thought, "I've got somewhere to be and need to get a move on right away," or "I only feel valued when I feel beautiful so I'm going to beautify myself immediately," or "I like to feel like I've taken care of myself and confident that at any moment, I could decide to leave the house and be prepared to meet up with anyone, a coworker, an ex, or my grandma."

The one that went out onto the porch may have taken a couple minutes in bed and thought, "You know what? This is a beautiful day with endless possibilities. I'm going to be present and just enjoy it," or "I want to do what's best for my body, so I'm going to go out on the porch, get some nature vitamins, and read a book on health," or "I have a reading addiction, time to read. Maybe I'll go outside so I can use the sunlight and not rack up my electric bill," or "Let me escape my miserable reality by reading."

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There, all of those thoughts and their end results of different behaviors. I'm sure you can see how each of those played out and why. Those are the thoughts, now let me touch on the feelings bit for a little deeper dive.

The thoughts that those versions of you may have had about themselves led to feelings before they led to actions. Let's start with "need" statements. When you say, "I need to get ready right now" ask yourself why. You don't actually need to get ready. Nothing is forcing you to. You don't need ANYTHING. Not food, water, sleep, friends, or new shoes. You need food, water, and sleep to live, but you don't need them if you aren't worried about staying alive. Need only works if it's followed by a "to" statement that is absolutely factual. Digest that.

I think that the transition from thought to feeling is connected with little trails all over the place that represent subliminal messages and subconscious thoughts. If you're saying "I need to get ready," the reason that you call it a need and not a want may be that you feel like you aren't worthy without beautification. That thought is what creates the coming feeling that caused you to jump right out of bed and get ready. Maybe it was desperation for approval, fear of rejection, or sadness about your current state. That's sad! This is why we work hard to change our subconscious views on life into positive ones. Imagine that instead of saying "I need to get ready," you say, "I want to get ready so that I know that I've put in time and effort into shaving my legs and doing my hair, so that I feel confident, clean, productive, and free."

Thought ----> Feeling ----> Behavior

I think I should wash myself clean and wear my favorite shoes ----> I feel like that will have me feeling like a cajillion bucks ----> *gets cuted up*

If you can break down your behaviors into feelings and the thoughts that start them, you'll know what to do to create lovelier habits that stick. around.

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Don't check out yet! I have a surprise-y type thing down below.

Thank you for reading love bug, I hope you're having a very sweet day. Please remember to like this post if you feel like it was up you ally (hehehe), please share it with any friends or family members that might benefit, or post to your instagram! The reason I ask you guys for this help each post is because soon I'd like to be a full time blogger and the quicker that word of the blog is spread, the sooner that I'm able to spend more time working on content for you guys including other mediums like youtube and podcasting. Hooray!

Now, for this week's Laundry List I'm thinking of posting a question sticker on my instagram story that says something like, "Tell me your goals and I'll tell you how to reach them" based off of this post. Those Q's and A's would be this week's list. If you'd like that, please DM me @allymmmounga with the orange fruit emoji, or send a goal that you're looking for some help with! That's all! Love you bye!!!